For Peter, the hardest thing was to get started.
He was feeling such intense pressure about the whole process of applying to universities that he could barely take the first step.
He was reluctant to start preparing for his admissions tests (it's an American thing), and even more reluctant to actually take them!
Peter had more than enough capability. He made rapid progress in practise, and nothing seemed difficult for him.
But the stress he felt was intense. It’s as if he feared trying things because he did not want to fail and disappoint, well, EVERYONE. So each step forward would be a victory: doing the practise, signing up for the test, showing up to take the test.
A bigger victory was still to come.
When he took the test the first time, he reported feeling “devastated.”
He did not do badly, but he felt he did not do as well as he knew he could.
So, here was the opportunity for Peter: learn to break the chain of regret.
Students often get into a vicious cycle of making an effort, falling short, and becoming swamped with regret for the “bad” performance.The pain of regret with each attempt can lead students to stop trying.
If Peter could learn to LET GO OF THE REGRET he felt about each “failed” attempt, then he could begin to lighten up the immense burden that he lived under.
And so he did.
He was able to make three more attempts, replacing the “devastation” he felt after the first one with a more neutral, observant approach.
His new-found ability to make the effort made a significant difference in his result, and opens up new possibilities for him for the future, too!
